Mar 29, 2012

The Onion Daily Dispatch - March 29, 2012

The Onion
Thu Mar 29, 2012

Scalia Unable To Name All 9 Supreme Court Justices 03.29.12

WASHINGTON—Associate Justice Antonin Scalia struggled to recall the names of all nine active Supreme Court justices while playing a trivia game Thursday, sources confirmed.

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New Walgreens Facebook Plugin Allows Users To See What Prescriptions Friends Are Picking Up

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SAT Takers Face Tighter Security

"That whole standardized test thing is overrated. I never took the SAT, and look at me now: I'm in the newspaper!"

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Sometimes I Feel Like I'm The Only One Who Gives A Shit About Rich, Lustrous Hair

by Marcus Russo , President and CEO, Pantene

By Marcus Russo, President and CEO, Pantene

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Scientific Journal Releases List Of Year's Top 100 Compounds

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Aries Mar 21 - Apr 19

This is a good time to make big moves at work, as you'll show up Monday to find all the furniture's gone and everyone has relocated to a new office somewhere outside Gary, IN.

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